Fear of Leaving Adventism
I am writing to you because I do not know where else to turn. Thank you for continuing your ministry and work for those searching for answers.
My husband was raised very conservative Adventist. I was raised very conservative Mormon. I left the Mormon church at 15 (thanks to my mother), but its hold on me remained, as I navigated the matrix of messy theology for the next several years. My story is a complex one, but I felt as though I had “come home” when I met my husband (at age 27).
I didn’t even know people went to church on Saturday until I met him. The timing of our meeting, and instant trust/friendship, coincided with a Revelation seminar conducted by none other than Leo Schreven. Well, if you ever heard him speak, you’ll understand how I was “sold” on Adventism. My goodness, I look back now and wonder how I fell into another cult! Maybe it is the similarities between SDA & LDS that made it all seem right. Even though I didn’t believe some of the SDA pillars, and always thought “Happy Sabbath” to be a silly thing to say…I was baptized and have remained without questioning because I respected my husband and didn’t want to hurt him by expressing my disbelief. I didn’t think the doctrines were all that bad, just a bit weird. Until…
Last year, I was looking up something about end times or the investigative judgment and came across this ministry. I read a bit, then promptly purchased all of Dale’s books, without telling my husband much. I just kept reading my Bible (in context), reading Dale’s books, listening to your podcast—and began to find that the doctrines I thought of as weird were actually heresy…blasphemy…denying the very divinity of Christ! Convoluting the gospel! Little by little, I mentioned a few things to my husband, and we’re now seeking truth together, trying to unwind it all and figure out how to move forward.
We’ve been faithful members all these years, following most of the rules, leading music ministry in every church we’ve moved to. Now, we live in a rural area with very tiny Adventist churches that have virtually no classes/activities for our 2 boys (ages 8 and 11). Over the last year, the Lord has been working on both of us, showing us the errors of EGW and the church. We no longer feel the need to attend church on Saturday and have been attending a Baptist church so that our boys can have some friends in Christ.
A very long path to get to my reason for writing…my husband is struggling with a deep fear of leaving completely, and how it will affect our boys. This is all he’s ever known. He loves Jesus and has noticed how the “Sunday keepers” are all so happy and seem to be so free. I believe he is still holding to Sabbath, diet laws, and the doctrine of soul sleep. He has expressed fear of not taking the boys to Sabbath School, for fear that they’ll go astray. Last night we were talking about how EGW had said that herself. I don’t know what I’m looking for, except that we’re feeling alone and muddling through the best we can. It did not go well when he tried to ask his mother about some concerns—she’s someone we really trust, a prayer warrior. She was clearly upset over questions about EGW’s validity. We want to follow Christ alone, in simplicity. And we want to lead our boys in His ways, helping them to make the transition to a life of freedom in Christ (rather than bondage to the Law) without all the confusion and dissonance we’re struggling with. If that makes sense…
Colleen, I know you and Richard had fairly young boys when you left.
Thank you for anything…prayers…encouragement. This journey is hard, but God is faithful.
—VIA EMAIL
Response: I am so glad that you wrote! What an incredible journey you have been on—and it makes complete sense to me.
I believe the reason you and your husband shared such an intuitive bond from the beginning—and why Schreven made so much sense to you—is that your husband and you shared, unknowingly, a foundational belief in a false god. Adventism really echoes Mormonism in many ways, and although Adventism developed a better deception of Jesus while Mormonism overtly made him a different being from the Father, still Adventism and Mormonism actually both believe that Jesus is not God Almighty. It was that spiritual tie to a false god that resonated with you, that made Adventism seem “familiar”.
I 100% resonate with your husband’s fear. That fear is built into Adventism; we were taught that if we leave EGW and the Sabbath, we will then leave the Bible and be lost. Adventists all have this deep fear, and many who leave Adventism because they can’t make Adventism “work” spin into unbelief entirely because they believe that Adventism is right. But when an Adventist is convinced that Adventism is wrong, the inarticulate fear is overwhelming.
That fear reflects the spiritual hold of Adventism. We finally realized that because we had believed doctrines of demons, because we understood that EGW could not have been used by God because she taught, all her life, a different Jesus, a different trinity, a false nature of man, and a salvation plan that was “Jesus plus obedience” instead of the biblical gospel of BELIEF and trust in the finished propitiation of Jesus’ blood for my sin—which includes my natural spiritual death. Because we believed heretical doctrines and a false Jesus, we were under the hold of the spirit of Adventism that gave EGW her false visions.
I worried a lot about the boys: what would it do to them if we left?? They were 11 and 15 when we left, and I agonized about the impact of taking them out of Adventist school and yanking them away from everyone they knew. I was so surprised when they were thrilled that we were leaving! They were relieved!
What finally made the difference for us was when we decided we had to actually renounce Adventism. We realized we had been shaped and held in spiritual bondage by a literal false spirit, an evil spirit that “owns” and claims Adventism through the teachings of EGW who was the prophet who listened to the spirit. Adventists, even if they don’t “believe” in EGW, nevertheless have her worldview in their heads, and they see all reality through her lens. That is the spiritual warp of Adventism’s legacy.
So one day we sat our boys down with us, and Richard talked about the fact that we were leaving Adventism. They were thrilled—to my surprise. Then he prayed a very straightforward prayer. He asked the Lord to remove the spirit of Adventism from our hearts and to place the Holy Spirit where Adventism had been. It wasn’t a long or elaborate prayer. It was straightforward, and we were committing ourselves to renouncing everything Adventist and to living in truth and reality in Jesus and His word.
Amazingly, when we finished that prayer, Richard said that was the moment he knew he was born again. For myself, I never again had the worried, backwards-looking fears of wondering what my Adventist acquaintances were thinking. I no longer felt torn or timid. We were utterly free in Jesus, free to pursue our life in the body of Christ.
I have come to believe that renouncing the false spirits that holds false religions is part of our repentance. When we know we have been wrong and see who Jesus really is, repenting of the past and repenting of the spiritual deception and spiritual hold of our idolatry is part of our trusting Jesus. Our boys were fine! Leaving Adventism and the Adventists never bothered them.
I will link you to our faith story that goes up to our leaving, but it tells the story of our renouncing Adventism.
I suspect that you and your husband may need to take this step—it involves a willingness to follow Jesus even if it means an alteration with the relationships with your Adventist relatives. But you don’t have to worry in advance about that. The Lord will lead you step by step, and if you have repented of the spiritual hold of Adventism, the Lord Jesus will hold you and continue to bring His word to your mind when you feel those pangs of doubt.
Here is a link to our story:
- April 27–May 3, 2024 - April 25, 2024
- We Got Mail - April 25, 2024
- April 20–26, 2024 - April 18, 2024