“I’m going shopping with my daughter this afternoon,” I heard Dale’s secretary say after church. We were still worshiping on the seventh day, and this comment jolted my mind. This was one of our church leaders. She was going shopping on Sabbath! In a moment I realized she had moved a step closer to accepting and living in the new covenant than I had. I understood clearly that God is now, under the new covenant, more concerned with our relationship with Him than He is with a day. I knew this lady had a good relationship with Jesus, and to this day her commitment to Jesus remains strong.
Even though the Biblical Fellowship Church continued to worship on the seventh day, it became clear that we could no longer use the seventh day in evangelism. Dale and I were going door-to-door one day inviting people to come and worship with us when we got into a discussion with the people at one house as to why we met on Saturday. Why did we not meet on Sunday? We must be some kind of a cult, they contended.
At this same time, we had some Sabbatarian people begin attending our group who held rather strange beliefs, and we did feel they were cultic in their position and practices. In addition, the Christian Missionary Alliance Church in Santa Cruz needed a pastor. Dale accepted this position and began pastoring two groups. He would preach to the BFC on Saturday and then to the CMA group on Sunday. There was a combined board from both groups, and it was the hope of most people, that the two groups would eventually merge into one group.
The CMA church always had a time of fellowship following the service where coffee and refreshments were served. One day I was helping put out the refreshments when I saw some ugly brown sub stance in the sink. “What in the world is this?” I asked in disgust. I thought it was a rusted drain pipe that had plugged and then backed up into the sink leaving this ugly deposit.
“Oh, that is just coffee grounds. Someone forgot to rinse them down the drain,” I learned as the lady answering looked at me in disbelief. I was not used to seeing coffee grounds of any kind, especially ones left in the sink!
The company where I was now working needed help one Saturday to complete a deadline for the release of a new software product. I had told them I could not work several times previously when asked, but this time it seemed OK to say yes. As I was driving to work on Saturday morning, strange thoughts were going through my mind.
Christian & Missionary Alliance Church.
Am I breaking the Sabbath? Am I losing my salvation? Will I receive the mark of the beast as SDAs teach? Am I really living the Christian life? Have I been deceived? What will the people in our church think? What will our family think?
I did not think our church family would be scandalized. We had studied the Sabbath, and most were no longer seeing the seventh day as a sacred day, even though that was the day we worshiped. They now believed that everyday was for the Lord and corporate worship could be on any day. No day is sacred- it is the Person of Jesus Christ. I was sure, however, that this act would worry my family.
I began reviewing in my mind all the verses in Galatians and praying for guidance to know if my actions were pleasing to God. Being pleasing to God was then, and continues to be, my desire. As I wrestled and prayed, a sweet peace and calm came into the car with me. I thanked God for showing us the truth of Scripture and for leading us out of Adventism. I thanked Jesus for totally paying the price for my sin and for counting me perfect because I had placed my trust in His perfect life. I knew God was more concerned with my trust and faith in the finished work of Jesus than He was with which day I worshiped Him corporately. I also knew Jesus wanted me to represent Him in all of my actions and felt He would be pleased that I was helping my employer that day.
This calm and peace led me to the next thoughts of how wonderful it is to be able to worship on any day of the week. I would be worshiping God on the next day-Sunday-with many other Christians around the world who would be doing the same thing. I began singing and praising God.
We left Adventism in October 1981 and in March of the next year, my dad died suddenly of a stroke. A month earlier he had had a five-bypass heart surgery. I visited him in the hospital in Portland, Oregon, right after the surgery. As I was visiting with him, I felt impressed to ask him where he had placed his trust. He assured me wholeheartedly that he was trusting in the finished work of Jesus. This thought gave me assurance at his funeral-knowing he was safe in the arms of Jesus.
When I was in town a few days after I had returned from Dad’s funeral, I met the women who had asked me to their home to discuss jewelry. “We are sorry to hear about your dad’s death,” they told me.
However, just prior to this, someone told me these women had said my dad’s death was God punishing me for leaving Adventism. It was easy to pick up the cynicism in their voices as they spoke to me. My response was one of sorrow for two reasons. First, I was still very sad over losing my dear daddy, and second, I was sad that these women were so blinded by Adventism that they felt God took my dad to punish me.
The joy and fellowship we were enjoying with our group in the Biblical Fellowship Church were sweet and rewarding. Even though I was no longer being paid to give Bible studies, we still had several even ing group studies, and people were still being led to the Lord.
On New Year’s Eve about two years after leaving Adventism, we invited the entire church to our home for a time of fellowship and games. However, it had been raining for days. We lived in the country, and the electricity was off. We did have a phone, though, and started calling people telling them we were cancelling the celebration. The first two or three people we spoke with said, “Oh, why don’t we all bring flashlights and candles and come have fun anyway?”
I remembered the other times of fun in the dark and eating gingerbread, and we agreed to go ahead with the planned New Year’s event. We continued our calling, asking everyone to bring candles and a gallon or two of water so we could flush the toilets. Without electricity for the pump, we had no water for the toilets.
The entire church showed up and most of the people brought water and candles or flashlights. We got out the games and people began playing and visiting and we ended with a sweet time of prayer.
Our only heat, without electricity, was a wonderful wood stove. It had a flat top, and since our kitchen was all electric I could not do any cooking or baking using the electric appliances. I mixed up gingerbread and baked it in a thick, flat bottom kettle on top of the wood stove. I had purchased the cream to whip and lots of milk for hot chocolate. Once again, this tasted so good and everyone was happy and having fun. The next morning we had gingerbread and hot chocolate spills all over the carpet, but it all came out with a good cleaning.
Through the years since leaving Adventism, people have often asked me, “Aren’t you bitter or angry about the way you have been treated?” My answer has always been, “It is only by God’s awe-inspiring grace that I can say ‘no’.” We have felt like Joseph felt, that what happened to us, God meant for good. I have only felt sorrow for the people who have accused us of things that are not true. We received a letter addressed to “The Church of Satan,” within weeks of leaving Adventism. We have been accused of leaving because we did not ever like Adventism in the first place, or that we wanted to live in sin. I think as you have read my story you would have to agree these accusations are far from true.
Adventism was our life. We loved it until we learned the sad truth that it was built on false doctrines supported by a false prophet. Coming to the realization that Ellen White wrote so many things that were not true, helped us to recognize that she was only supporting her own cause when she states that those who begin to doubt her writings will be lost. There is no biblical support for such a radical statement.
I can honestly say I still have many happy memories of being an Adventist. The Friday night and Saturday night worship and singing times around our piano in Phoenix, with a living room crowded with teenagers, are a real highlight. I recall the songs of commitment we used to sing. “Dare to be a Daniel. ..dare to have a purpose firm, dare to make it known.” “The Captain calls for you. Volunteers, volunteers, volunteers.” This song speaks of the need for young people to go and witness for Jesus. I always felt called to a commit ment during the singing of this song. “I serve a risen Savoir, He’s in the world today … He lives within my heart.” I loved the happy Sabbath afternoon times growing up, and the same times with our young family. Yet, when our boys were teenagers, we were very hard on them. We wanted them to believe in and follow all the rules of Ellen White. We would not let them attend ballgames, go bowling, or attend movies-activities in which many of their Adventist friends participated.
I loved the way my mother would often respond to me when I was a teenager. I would ask her whether she felt it was OK to do a certain activity. So many times her answer would be, “What do you think Jesus would do in this situation?” I often wished she had given me a direct yes or no answer, but her question made me think, and I was left to make the decision myself. Sometimes this was harder than if she had simply said, “No, I don’t want you to do that.”
The times at camp meeting in Prescott, Arizona, were times when I made a deeper commitment to Jesus for which I am thankful. I have happy memories of my school days and of being in the ministry with Dale. I loved witnessing and giving Bible studies and seeing people come to know Jesus. In fact, long before we left Adventism, I was having problems reaching my baptism goals that were necessary to maintain employment, because my focus was on leading people to Christ- not a church. Many people thanked me for telling them about Jesus, but also told me they just could not see the reason to join the Seventh-day Adventist church. The husband of one of those families is now a pastor in a large Christian church in Maui.
My dreams of being a pastor’s wife turned out to be a little different from what I envisioned they would be as a child. While this was a very good experience and I loved it, I did not get to greet people in the SDA church as I thought I would be able to. There were always pre-appointed committees for this position, and I was viewed as an intruder. I had to wait until Dale was pastoring outside the Adventist system to do this.
Being a pastor’s wife also provided some amusing moments. One of the first times I visited a woman with Dale I was admiring a picture on her wall, complimenting her on her taste in art. She went to the picture; I thought to straighten it a little, took it off the wall and insisted I take it. I of course refused. She insisted for a while that I take it, but I would not. Later this lady gave Dale an old silverware chest to give to me. Dale also did not want to take this, but when he saw how worthless it really was he finally accepted it and brought it home to me. When I saw it, I asked, “Why do we need this, we don’t even have silverware to put in it?”
Dale laughed and said, “Open it.”
When I opened it, I gasped, as all I saw were some dead moths and a few cobwebs! I laughed too, and this box immediately went to the trash.
Many things about Adventism are good. However, the longer we are out of Adventism, the more we believe historic Adventism is a cult, and a very dangerous one, as it makes people believe it is an evangelical Christian organization when it is not. More importantly, it confuses the gospel. We have found it to be so deceptive in many of its practices, and beliefs. Today our hearts are filled with joy as many former SDAs thank us for leading them to the truth of the gospel, and helping them to be freed from the bondage of false religion.
God has blessed us in so many ways. Shortly after leaving Adventism we experienced the sweet touch of the Holy Spirit. Right after this the Bible seemed like a new book to us. We each wanted to read and reread every New Testament book and did this several times. It seemed we could not get enough of the good news. We also had many little “miracle” experiences that confirmed that our experience was real.
One day I was on my way to give a Bible study while I was still employed by the Biblical Fellowship Church. Dale had just left for an appointment. Bruce was at work and Mike was away at school. I was alone and my car would not start. There was not even a small sound of the engine trying to turn over. I turned the key and prayed, and prayed and turned the key. No sound! I did this several times. Then I prayed in the Spirit and turned the key and immediately the car started.
“Why, God, did you answer this prayer and not the others?” I asked half laughingly.
It seemed as if God were saying to me, “Because I wanted you to not doubt the touch of the Holy Spirit. I want you to know it was real, and it was from Me.”
Another time many of our church members were at a conference in San Jose. The conference was ending with a time of small group prayer. I met with a group of women I had never met before. As we were getting acquainted it was suggested that we all pray silently for God to point out the person who needed prayer that day. At the end of that first prayer, everyone said that I was the one God wanted to bless. I had also sensed that during the prayer time but did not know why. They all began praying for me-some quietly aloud and others silently.
As this was happening, God gave me a picture that is still so clear in my mind it is as if it had just happened. I was seeing the beautiful Garden of Eden, more beautiful than I have ever seen in a picture. I was walking down a path with gorgeous lawns, flowers, bushes and trees. I had never seen anything so perfect. It is hard to describe. As I was walking on this path Jesus met me and said, “See all this beautiful creation. It is perfect. I did it all. You had nothing to do with making this garden beautiful.” Jesus took my hand, and we continued walking in this beautiful garden and He kept repeating, “I did it all. This beautiful masterpiece is all perfect because of Me. I am the One who made all this perfect. You didn’t have anything to do with this magnificent perfection.”
Suddenly Jesus started running, still firmly holding my hand. We ran out of the garden and into heaven. Jesus took me up to God the Father who was sitting on His throne. The picture in my mind was of great big God on the throne and a little tiny man kneeling in front of God begging for forgiveness. (I had seen this picture when in high school that some artist used to depict the investigative judgment.) As Jesus took me closer to God, the picture began to change. The look on God’s face changed from one of sternness to one of love, peace and acceptance. God the Father had a beautiful smile on His face. Jesus took me right up to God, and I was not afraid! I just stood there a moment looking at God. Then the Father got off His throne, got down on the floor of heaven, and began rolling with laughter. (The memory of a time when once my Dad and we girls were being silly and Dad was on the floor laughing with us came to my mind.) This is what I saw God do in heaven. He was having fun with me!
I started laughing and the ladies asked why I was laughing, but I didn’t answer right at that moment. They just kept praying that God would continue to bless me.
Then I saw Jesus on the cross. I had my mother’s hand in my right hand and my dad’s hand in my left hand. We were walking up to the cross, but could not get very close. I wondered about this, and Jesus said to me, “You must be willing to forsake all, take up my cross and follow only Me.”
This vision, picture, or whatever it was, showed me that there is nothing I could do on my own to be perfect. The only perfection I had was all in Jesus. I have always been somewhat of a perfectionist. I do not think there is anything wrong with doing one’s best at the job at hand, but when perfection of behavior becomes the focus, and standards are set that others must abide by, that is wrong. This is what I had been doing. Jesus is our only standard. I realized anew, and it seemed I needed to keep being reminded, that my trust in Jesus is the only perfection I have. As this truth started to become my reality in my daily life, I saw myself slowly changing from the judgmental, obnoxious person I had been to becoming a new creature in Christ. Our sons even mentioned to me one day that I was a different person.
To God be the glory!
I do not know if I would call that experience a vision, but it was a very special moment for me that is still very clear in my mind. It also confirmed that we had made the right decision in following truth and not a false doctrine.
We were recently asked, “Just how did you get out of Adventism?”
Dale’s quick answer was, “We studied the Bible.”
I then explained that SDAs pride themselves on studying the Scripture and in knowing and believing the whole Bible- not just part of it like some denominations. I admitted that was my belief also as an SDA. Yes, we studied the Bible almost daily, but until God began to lift the veil from our eyes, we did not really know what the Bible was teaching.
God has blessed us in so many ways since leaving Adventism. Dale pastored in four more churches before retiring from pastoring. We have owned a couple of businesses. Both of us were recently in real estate until I decided to quit.
We have witnessed the marriage of both of our boys, and we have and enjoy our four wonderful grandchildren.
We both still love the Lord with all our hearts and are active in our local church. We are involved with Life Assurance Ministries, Inc., which produces the Proclamation! journal that goes to about 33,000 homes every other month. We own and manage LAM Publications, which publishes the books Dale has written as well as books by other authors, including this one.
We frequently thank God for leading us out of Adventism. It is wonderful today to be part of a church that focuses on the gospel- the good news that all who believe in Jesus and accept Him as a substitution for their own life, will be saved.
We praise God for His great love and care for us!
My Cup Overflows. Copyright © 2009 by Carolyn Ratzlaff. All Scripture quotations—except where otherwise noted—are from The New American Standard Bible, © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1975, 1979, 1994 by the Lockman Foundation, used by permission. All rights reserved. Life Assurance Ministries, Inc.
Carolyn has always been a positive person enjoying life and outdoor activities such as hiking and gardening, and she and her husband currently raise a good portion of their own food in small grow boxes. She also reads many health journals and is often surprised at the contrast between what was taught through the writings of Ellen White on forbidden items of diet and health, and the beneficial evidence of these same items which is supported by a plethora of scientific studies.
She and her husband Dale Ratzlaff have two married sons and four grandchildren.
- 25. That Very Special Occasion - March 24, 2022
- 24. Living in the New Covenant - March 17, 2022
- 23. Crisis in Freedom - March 10, 2022