Should I Witness to an Adventist Ex-Boyfriend?
I was dating an Adventist, but we have broken up. We still have a friendship and…still communicate, and I want to somehow bring up certain erroneous Adventist beliefs but want to do it in a way where defenses won’t necessarily go up. He enjoys having these types of conversations… I know ultimately it’s on God to change him but I want to plant seeds while I still have some level of influence in his life.
- It may seem random but should I even be friends with him if we don’t agree on what the Bible says?
- If a form of friendship is ok, how can I go about planting seeds?
He is the type to take what I say into consideration, so I want to be wise about my approach.
—VIA EMAIL
Response: Thanks for writing! I can’t give you direct advice about whether or not to have this friendship; the Lord will have to be your guide on this matter. I can say this in general: Continuing a friendship with a former boyfriend keeps the heart ties connected and keeps you (and him) unable to fully move on with your lives. There will always be a bit of loyalty and even, perhaps, a grain of hope that the relationship might be able to be restored. It leaves you attached to the past.
If he does meet the Lord and become a true believer ,and if he then wants a relationship with you, he knows how to find you! The Lord, ultimately, will bring you to the right man. But if you broke up with him for good reasons (and being an unbeliever and deceived is a good reason to break up), then remaining partly attached is like an incomplete “surgery”. You still have part of the problem within, and you can’t live an unencumbered life with freedom to make new attachments. A partial dis-attachment will leave him tethered to you as well and will feed his hope that you aren’t fully opposed to his Adventism but have left the door open to him and his beliefs. (I know how Adventists think about these things in general although I don’t know him specifically.) They are masters at rationalizing “evangelistic dating”.
I think you have to ask yourself: “Would I maintain this sort of ongoing friendship and conversation with a Mormon? With a Buddhist who wanted to date me? With a Jehovah’s Witness?” If the answer is “No,” then you have your answer. If there is enough personal investment in this friendship that you could not condone such a relationship with a Mormon or a Buddhist, then you have to conclude that having this sort of relationship with an Adventist is exactly the same thing: he has a false gospel and a false Jesus and a false view of what a human actually IS.
If you want to leave him with something he can do in an ongoing way to pursue truth, suggest that he listen to the Former Adventist Podcast, or perhaps the Former Adventist Fact Check. He can find all of it on the Former Adventist YouTube channel. And challenge him to read the book of Galatians every day for a month, asking God to show him what He knows He wants him to know. Then he should continue through the rest of the New Testament books: Hebrews, Colossians, Ephesians, Romans…
I’m sorry to be such a “Debbie Downer”, but to continue the friendship in this case sounds like potential entanglement and trouble. The Lord knows how to bring him what he needs, and He knows how to comfort your heart.
Link To Gary Inrig’s Revelation Series
I have enjoyed your series on Revelation [on Former Adventist Podcast].
You refer to your pastor’s teaching on it. Would you share with me where I could access that teaching?
—VIA EMAIL
Response: Here is the link to the “Revelation” playlist on our Former Adventist YouTube channel:
Give Me One Text That Changes the Sabbath to Sunday
I’m proud to be an Adventist. You just said you were an Adventist [in this video].
Can I ask you one question: where in the New Testament does it say that the fourth commandment has changed from the seventh day to the first? Can you show me at least one verse? Please remember to read Mark 7:6-11:
He answered and said to them, “Well did Isaiah prophesy of you hypocrites, as it is written:
‘This people honors Me with their lips,
But their heart is far from Me.
7 And in vain they worship Me,
8 “For laying aside the commandment of God, you hold the tradition of men—the washing of pitchers and cups, and many other such things you do.”
9 ¶ He said to them, “All too well you reject the commandment of God, that you may keep your tradition.
10 “For Moses said, ‘Honor your father and your mother’; and, ‘He who curses father or mother, let him be put to death.’11 “But you say, ‘If a man says to his father or mother, “Whatever profit you might have received from me is Corban”—’ (that is, a gift to God),
—VIA YOUTUBE
Response: No. There is no text that changes the seventh day to the first day. Neither is there ANY New Testament text that commands the seventh-day Sabbath for Christians. Quite the opposite, in fact: Romans 14:5, 6; Colossians 2:16, 17; Hebrews 4:1–9—these explain that the seventh-day Sabbath is not required for Christians. REST in CHRIST is the New Covenant command. There is no “holy time” in the new covenant. Read the book of Galatians every day for a month, and ask the Lord to teach you what He wants you to know. †
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